Pleas from Banned Gamers

Bungie recently put up an article showing some of the emails they get from Halo2 gamers that have been banned from playing online due to cheating, modding, etc. As you can imagine, hilarity ensues. After reading the article, I don't know what's worse. The fact that these people are so utterly clueless or the fact that they have butchered our language to such a degree that only "literary terrorism" can describe it. These people have declared jihad on the English language and should be treated accordingly.